Wednesday, April 21, 2010

you find out who your friends are





You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who you're friends are

Everybody wants to slap your back
Wants to shake your hand
When you're up on top of that mountain
But let one of those rocks give way then you slide back down look up
And see who's around then

This ain't where the road comes to an end
This ain't where the bandwagon stops
This is just one of those times when
A lot of folks jump off

You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who you're friends are

When the water's high
When the weather's not so fair
When the well runs dry
Who's gonna be there

These lyrics have been heavy on my heart recently, which is rare and even a little bit odd considering I’m not really a huge fan of country music.

I typically try to do a good job of hiding how I really feel, at least when I’m sad. Excitement kind of gets away from me sometimes, but I’d say for the most part, I’m pretty good at playing the “Happy Face” game. So good, in fact, that I even think I had some of my closest friends convinced everything was great.

But are things ok? I mean, really? No. Recently I told them, I let them know how much I had been struggling,…that I needed a friend.

My best friends are scattered across the country right now. That’s hard. I bet if you asked my best friends what was going on in my life right now, they wouldn’t be able to tell you much.

The week before last I went out to coffee with a friend and I was telling her how hurt I had felt, like I was losing my best friends, like they didn’t care. And that is when she helped me to see the huge misconception I had believed about friendship. You see, friendship isn’t about you (or me). The point of a friendship is not to see what I can get out of it, or how I can benefit from it…but rather “what can I do for them?” No wonder I had started to harbor bitterness, I was expecting my friends to check on me, call me, look out for me, pray for me, visit me. It was all about ME.

God knows me so well. I’m amazed every day that he reveals a different part of my heart to me. He knows my tendency to depend on people over Him. Maybe that’s why my best friends are so far away right now. It certainly would be easier to run to them if I was having a bad day than it would be to sit still and listen to God.

For as long as I can remember I’ve been blessed with great friends. At every stage of my life I had one (and often times more) best friend to stand with me through thick and thin. This new phase of life, this new independence, is completely foreign to me. It’s like I don’t even know how to operate without them here. And I know the Lord is using this time for me to grow, but its not easy. I miss their fellowship. I miss all the fun. I miss them.

But I don’t NEED them. Friends are special blessings in life, but if there is one thing I’ve learned through this experience, it is that God is really all I need. He is the only one that will fill those empty spaces in my life. And so from now on I’m going to try and be a little less needy. I’m going to really invest and love on my friends (no matter how far away they are) b/c I value them so much. And truth is, I haven’t been that great of a friend either.

2 comments:

  1. MIR-this is beautiful. i love seeing how the Lord is growing you. im so glad to be counted as one of your friends

    ReplyDelete
  2. thanks for going to coffee with me ;)

    ReplyDelete